My life has been so busy and full lately, leaving my blog rather quiet and empty.
It's funny, there are so many days when I get to the end, exhausted, worn out, and feeling like I've accomplished almost nothing.
I'm such a project oriented person, that sometimes it's difficult for me to see the value (long term and short term) in "just" being a mom. In "just" being there for my babies. In "just" making healthy meals for them and my husband each day.
Today was a little different. I'm still tired at the end of the day. I have a headache for some unknown reason, but I feel like I did a lot today.
What changed? Mostly my attitude. I didn't cross off that many things from my "to-do" list, but there were so many moments today that I just took a second to let it sink it how incredibly blessed I am.
My husband goes to work every day, faithfully, even when he doesn't feel like it, to provide a good life for us. And we have a good life! I get to stay home with my precious children, be with them all day, watch their little smiles, feel their little hugs, watch them changing every day. I get to teach them things, and hear them laugh. Yes, I get frustrated, sometimes, really frustrated. But at the end of the day, I wouldn't have it any other way!
I admit, I struggle sometimes with feeling fulfilled. I wonder what it's like "out there." I wonder what it would be like to have a "real job" and feel like I'm contributing more financially to our home. But then I think about our children, and almost keel over with gratefulness that I, not someone else gets to raise these children; that I get to spend time learning about the healthiest and most delicious and beautiful ways to feed my family; that I get to spend time creating beauty and organizing our home to make it a nicer place to be.
I sometimes wish that I had hours to just think and study and figure life out. But you know what, I'm figuring it out as I go! I'm snatching time to read my Bible when I have a quiet moment, I'm praying as I work (although not nearly as often as I should!).
I have it soooooooo good! I have bad days, where I spend a lot of my time complaining, audibly or inwardly. And yet, the truth is that God has given me so much more than I deserve!